Shirley (Cadman) Frisby
Shirley Frisby
Shirley Cadman was born in Spennymoor on 3 April 1936 . Shirley’s younger sister Irene was born in Spennymoor and the family moved to West Cornforth shortly after in 1938.
Shirley’s father, Louis Cadman, was in the Royal Navy. He was serving on the Repulse as part of Force Z assigned to deter Japanese aggression in the Far East. The Repulse was sunk by Japanese aircraft while attempting to intercept Japanese landings in British Malaysia on the 10 December 1941. The little girls’ father went down with his ship leaving his wife and daughters without a husband and father.
Louis Cadman’s sacrifice is commemorated on West Cornforth’s Cenotaph.
At the time of their father’s death Shirley was five and a half years old and her sister Irene was two years younger; the girls were living in New Road Terrace, with their mother Rhoda. They had moved from Spennymoor to be close to Mrs Cadman’s mother; grannie Black.
Rhoda was one of ten children. Grannie Black was a very capable woman, well known and respected down the Lowside. Her grandson Bill has fond memories of her legendary stottie cakes. The whole family visited Grannie Black each Saturday taking freshly baked stottie cake home for tea. Shirley’s widowed mother and grandmother, ‘grannie Black’ cared for the two girls.
.
Rhoda slowly rebuilt her life, after the death of Louis, eventually falling in love with, and marrying John Platten Gardner who fulfilled the role of father for Shirley and her sister Irene. As the family grew they moved from New Road Terrace to Laburnum Road, and then to Ash Terrace. Shirley and Irene’s new sisters and brothers; Stella, John, Matt and Carol were born between 1947 and 1952.
Carol and John remember their family as very caring. Shirley and Irene were loving big sisters. Shirley was a great help to her mother and father; watching out for the younger children, always calm, never shouting. Shirley was gentle and indulged them all. Their other ‘big sister’ Irene was equally caring but stricter than Shirley. They were a happy, close family with hard working, loving parents.
Shirley was a talented sports woman and captained the house netball team.
Shirley left school at fifteen and went to work in the canteen at the NCB workshops at Tursdale. Gordon Frisby worked on the crane at the workshops. The young couple met at Tursdale and soon started going out together. Shirley lived with her family in Ash Terrace when she married Gordon, the love of her life, at Holy Trinity Church on the Green at Cornforth.
John and Carol remember the happy couple leaving for their honeymoon, and Gordon throwing lots of coins to the waiting children who scrambled on the pavement for them. This Doggie tradition is followed in other parts of the North East and Scotland. It is believed that throwing coins brings financial security to newlyweds.
‘Ha’pennies and pennies and thrupenny bits, trying to catch them in grubby mits,
Pushing and shoving on the ground, chasing the coins that were rolling around,
Down in the gutter for the last few pence; at the time it made perfect sense.’
After they married Shirley and Gordon moved into Bridge Road. Shirley was a natural homemaker, a skilled baker and cook. Shirley and Gordon were devoted to each other and to Gary their son who was born in 1965. Gordon continued to work at Tursdale. Shirley looked after her home and supported her parents, arriving regularly at their home with cakes and pies that she had baked for them.
Shirley went to work at West Cornforth Primary School as a temporary cook for three weeks in 1975. Shirley loved it so much she stayed for thirty one years, only retiring after she reached seventy. Shirley was very sad to leave as she had strong ties with the staff and children whom she loved dearly.
On Shirley’s retirement the head teacher described Shirley as being well loved and respected in the village for her work looking after generations of children. Shirley continued to help out at the school whenever she could.
Sometime before Shirley retired her beloved Gordon became ill with meningitis. He was taken to hospital in Newcastle as he needed specialist medical attention and nursing care. Gordon recovered slowly and was moved to Dryburn to be closer to home. Shirley was so pleased to have him home for short spells as part of his recuperation. He went back into hospital to complete his recovery. The date was set for him to return home for good. Shirley and Gordon were delighted.
Shirley’s brother John was in Dryburn hospital at the same time as Gordon recovering from a car accident. The brothers in law met up in the hospital and celebrated Gordon’s leaving hospital for home the next day. Sadly Gordon had an unexpected aneurism that night and died. Shirley was devastated as was the whole family.
Losing her beloved Gordon hit Shirley hard. Her job kept her going.
Shirley adored her twin granddaughters; Danielle and Jessica and visited them at their home in Durham as often as she could.
Shirley continued living in their family home in Bridge Street where friends from the village visited her after her retirement. One of the community projects involved leaving angels on people’s doors and when someone asked for an angel to leave on Shirley’s door through the Cornforth History Page many people shared special memories of Shirley.
Lots of memories of Nanny Shirley at school…everyone used to argue over who got to hold her hand….
They did indeed….. Shirley is amazing she made doggie school the best memories….
Shirley’s one of many Cornforth legends….
I have one here (an angel) which I will gladly give to Shirley….love Shirley she was telling me she still has a purse I bought her when I was at school…
Absolutely love Nan!!!!! Always followed her when I was little. Love her to Bits!!!! Would love to leave her one xx
Shirley is my cousin, it’s fantastic to hear that she is so highly regarded in Doggie. She is great!
Say hello to Auntie Shirley for me please. Love her to bits she’s not really my auntie but always called her that when she was our dinner lady. She goes to see my mum often
I still have two here if anyone wants them Shirley is a wonderful, warm, caring person…
Thanks to Lesley I put an angel on Shirley’s door handle yesterday. She caught me in the act alas but was very pleased and touched by it
Shirley became increasingly frail and attended a day centre in the village. People missed seeing her around the village, and asked about her through the Facebook Page. The arrival of Covid 19 and the lockdown restrictions meant the day centre had to close. Shirley, like many others in her situation were hit hard by the lack of opportunity to meet with others.
Shirley became more ill and sadly died on July 4. With limits to the number of mourners at funerals it looked as if the many, many people who wished to would not be able to pay their respects. Doggie folk are not easily put off. The streets were lined as Shirley’s cortege passed through the village. There was a moving tribute all along the school railings to their much loved nanny.
Shirley was a loving mother, devoted grandmother, loyal and supportive sister, who touched the hearts and held the hands of many in the village.
Carol Monaghan, and John Gardener were talking to Margaret Sowerby and Julie Leitheiser. Thanks also to Bill Black and contributors to Cornforth History Facebook Page. September 1920
