Love and Marriage

Marriage has never been as commonplace as we have perhaps been led to believe. Couples have lived together as if they were married, without being married, throughout history. People have accepted this.

During the First World War separation allowances and pensions were paid to all dependents of servicemen including their unmarried wives.

People who lived together as if they were married may not have been able to marry because one or other of them was divorced. Divorce discriminated against women. Women possibly endured unhappy marriages because the alternative was destitution and being ostracised by the community.

In the first half of the twentieth century life was insecure and uncertain for single mothers who did not have a man to support them. At this time society was narrow, closed, and dominated by archaic unspoken rules and beliefs. There was an underlying concept that unmarried mothers and divorced women somehow put others in moral danger.

Support from the state was meagre and women lived in fear of being judged. It is difficult to imagine the mind – set of a community that would cast out, or cast aspersions on, vulnerable women in situations they had not chosen or caused by themselves

There was huge pressure on women, who found they were pregnant, to marry before the baby was born. Decisions were often taken by, or dependent on, the wishes of the parents of the young couple who were expecting the baby. Parental permission was needed for men and women aged under 21 who wished to marry.

There is a belief that attitudes changed for the better as a result of the liberating nineteen sixties. However old views, and perceptions could still persist and add to the challenges faced by newly-weds who were expectant parents.